And it came to pass, that HK, the Devoid, was strolling around in his head one day, for he had nothing better to do, when the Great Goddess Eris did appear in sparkles of beautiful luminosity that HK missed totally because she appeared behind him.

"I am Eris, Goddess of Discord and Chaos," She happily proclaimed.

"That's nice," replied HK, the Unbeliever, as he kept on walking.

"No, really," replied Eris, walking after him, "I really am and I say you are free!"

HK, the Heretic did turn to face Her Greatness and say, "Look, you're just another aspect of my mind that's come to bother me with pantheistic crap and I really want to be alone right now."

HK, the Idiot, did turn to walk away and did see great megaliths before him with writing covering them from top to bottom.

"Written on these are all the answers to your questions," said Eris smartly and wisely.

HK, the dumbass, smashed the first one without reading it, saying, "Yeah, right."

"Why'd you do that?" asked Eris.

"Because it's not real," said HK, the Insipid, "this is all in my head."

He then smashed the rest of them and kept walking.

"How do you know?" said Eris, starting to become a little annoyed. "You didn't even bother to read them! Most people at least glance through them before rejecting them!"

HK, the Numbskull, did then stop and turn to Eris again, saying, "There was no wisdom or knowledge there, they were just figments of my mind that I made up im my desperate need for wisdom and knowledge in this fucked up part of my life and none of this is real!"

"Are you saying I'm not real?" asked the Most Wonderful Goddess.

"You do not exist," said HK, the Moron. He then proceeded to walk away again, but Eris stopped him in his tracks by saying:

"Then I will prove to you that I am real and not a part of your silly imagination." She gave a smile that was lost on HK, the Damned and vanished.

Over the course of time, Eris haunted HK, the Suffering's dreams, She blew out his tires, screwed up his life and turned everything upside down and shook it like a Magic 8-Ball until there were too many bubbles to read the answer and then, after all that, HK the Newly Enlightened finally gave in.

"Okay, you win," said HK, the Wisened, said one day in his head.

"Good," replied Eris. "Now then, down to business..."

And thus it came about that HK, the Devoid, became HK, Discordian Pope and lived happily ever sometimes. For Eris is still a bit pushy at times, but HK has gotten used to being Her bitch.

Eris isn't always first pick in the lineup of beliefs, so She sometimes has the tendency to push everyone in front of Her out of the way and take matters into Her own hands.

HK, the Pope still has no idea what was written on the megaliths, Eris wont tell him.

END

~HK~